In a discovery that has historians scratching their heads and tech enthusiasts drooling, a team of archaeologists announced the unearthing of an ancient civilization that apparently mastered modern technology millennia ago. Dubbed the "Wi-Fians," this mysterious society was found buried beneath what is now downtown Nevada, complete with fossilized smartphones, solar-powered togas, and a well-preserved community Facebook page carved into stone tablets.

Lead archaeologist Dr. Ima Diggit explained, "We initially thought we had found a standard Bronze Age settlement, but when our translator app started picking up notifications, we knew we were onto something extraordinary. The Wi-Fians had seemingly mastered Instagram filters and had an uncanny obsession with group selfies."

One of the most baffling artifacts was a perfectly preserved charging station shaped like a sundial. "It’s like they figured out renewable energy and social media before they even invented the wheel," said Dr. Diggit. "We even found a graffiti wall where citizens complained about Wi-Fi speeds and the latest batch of buggy apps."

Local resident Bob McGee commented, "I always thought my Wi-Fi problems were a modern curse, but apparently, it dates back thousands of years. Makes me feel better about yelling at my router. Maybe the Wi-Fians had bad service too!"

As the excavation continues, experts suggest that this discovery will rewrite history textbooks and probably inspire a new line of retro tech gadgets. For now, the Wi-Fians remain a reminder that maybe, just maybe, humanity has always been obsessed with their phones—even if it meant carving them into stone.