SACRAMENTO, CA — In an unprecedented move to boost statewide morale, California lawmakers have unanimously passed the "Mandatory Happiness Act," requiring all residents to display a minimum of 37.5% genuine happiness during daylight hours. Failure to comply may result in fines, mandatory group hugs, or — in extreme cases — public tickling sessions.

Governor Sunny Skies, the bill’s chief advocate, stated, "We realized that California’s beaches, sunshine, and avocados weren’t enough. Now, happiness is not just encouraged, it’s required. We’ve even installed Smile Meters on street corners to ensure compliance." The Smile Meters, resembling oversized emoji statues, reportedly scan facial expressions and dispense free ice cream to those exceeding the happiness quota.

Not everyone is thrilled about the new law. Local resident Grim Gus grumbled, "I’m allergic to forced joy. Last week, I smiled for a whole hour and my face cramped. Now the government wants me to be happy too? What’s next, mandatory laughter yoga?" Meanwhile, Happiness Coach Joy Bubbles is already hosting workshops titled "Fake It Till You Make It: The Art of Mandatory Smiling."

Some skeptics worry about the law’s enforcement. "Are they going to arrest people for having bad days?" questioned Karen from Fresno. Officials assure the public that enforcement will be gentle and mostly involve cheerful music and surprise puppy parades. As the sun sets on the Golden State, one thing is clear: in California, happiness isn’t just the pursuit—it’s the law.

Stay tuned as officials prepare to roll out "Mandatory Dance Breaks" next quarter, because apparently, toe-tapping is now a civic duty.