In a move that has neuroscientists scratching their heads and New Yorkers clutching their temples, the city council of New York is seriously considering a ban on "loud thinking." Yes, you read that right. Loud thinking—the supposedly noisy internal monologue that some claim can be heard if you listen hard enough—is on the chopping block.

Councilwoman Mindy P. Quietus, the bill’s chief sponsor, insists this isn’t just a whimsical idea sparked by too many subway rides. “The city is tired of uncontrollable mental noise causing disturbances in libraries, coffee shops, and during particularly intense pizza debates,” she declared. “If your brain decides to shout ‘What was I supposed to do again?’ in a crowded deli, you might be looking at a hefty fine.”

Not everyone is on board with the proposal. Dr. Ima N. Thoughtful, a leading psychologist who studies cognitive volume control, warns, “Suppressing loud thinking could lead to a dangerous buildup of silent thoughts, potentially causing spontaneous outbursts of interpretive dance or extreme pantomime.” Meanwhile, local New Yorker Joe Average said, “If I have to think quietly, how will I ever win at chess against my own brain? It’s a battle out loud, man.”

Though the bill is still in early discussions, some residents have already begun practicing “silent thinking,” complete with finger guns to mimic internal monologues. Whether this leads to a quieter city or an epidemic of mime artists remains to be seen. One thing’s for sure: New York’s thoughts just might become the quietest thing on the block—until the city decides to ban telepathic eye rolls next.